Weighing and Wanting
by groteskfaery
Summary: Adam is happy and successful in both his career and his personal life... So why can't he stop thinking about his best friend? Slash m/m


_Disclaimer: I do not own Adam Copeland or Jason Reso or their wrestling personas. None of this ever happened to my knowledge. The title is inspired by a piece of art by William Kentridge and is not mine._

_Warnings: Masturbation_

Adam let out a long sigh as the hot water beat down on his aching body. He leaned back against the wall of the shower, tilting his head back against the cool tile as the water coursed down his body in steaming rivulets. He ran his fingers through his long blonde hair, reflecting on the night's match; it had been a good one, but long and grueling, and it had left him sore and thoroughly exhausted. Punk hadn't gone easy on him that night, that was for sure, he thought. He wondered vaguely how Jay's match was going, or if it was over already. Normally, he would have stayed backstage to watch, but tonight he was just too tired. He thought of Jay locking up with his opponent, the powerful muscles of his torso rippling, his tights stretched over his firm buttocks…

Adam's hazel-green eyes flew open, his mouth hanging slightly agape in surprise. Had he really just thought that? He shook his head, his blonde locks flinging droplets of water in all directions. No, of course not. Jay was his best friend, his brother… and a man. He didn't think of him that way. Couldn't think of him that way. An old memory pushed at the boundaries of his brain, threatening to come into the open and be remembered, but he pushed it away. He hadn't thought that way in twenty years...

_Summer 1990, Orangeville, Ontario, Canada_

Adam laid on his bed, sweaty and lethargic from the sweltering heat in the air conditioning-less apartment. Scattered around him were several wrestling magazines, video game cases, various articles of clothing, and a few neglected textbooks. His window was open and a small fan sat on his bedside table, spinning feebly in a vain attempt to cool him off. He had tried to watch a VHS of the last pay per view which he had taped to learn new techniques, but he found himself unable to concentrate and switched it off. He had thought of inviting Jay over to play the Nintendo system he had worked odd jobs for six months to buy, but decided against it because of the heat. He sat up and groaned, pulling his jeans off so that he was left in only his boxers. He laid back down and put one arm behind his head, using his other hand to push his slightly damp hair off of his forehead. His eyes slid closed and his lips parted slightly as he let his mind wander to the pretty girl he had kissed at a party last week. She had been tall and curvy, and she had let him massage her breasts through her shirt as they made out. He had really hoped that she would let him go all the way, but their session had been cut short by the boyfriend she hadn't mentioned. He was slightly ashamed that at seventeen he still hadn't lost his virginity. His old girlfriend had given him a blowjob once, but it was short and sloppy and he hadn't really enjoyed it.

He sighed quietly as he thought of a pair of soft, full, knowledgeable lips wrapped around him. He could feel himself getting hard and he ran his hand down his long torso, pausing to gently tweak his nipple. He ran his fingertips over his cock, enjoying the feeling of his fingers brushing against his skin. Slowly, he slipped his fingers under the waistband of his now tight boxers. He wrapped his hand around his hard cock and began to slowly stroke himself. He leaned his head back and licked his lips, imagining the lips bobbing up and down on his throbbing member. His breath hitched as he started to stroke faster, thinking of all the girls he would love to have suck him off. He twisted his hand as he pumped his cock, and after a few minutes he could feel his orgasm nearing. He stroked himself still faster, and an image of a tall, muscular blonde crossed his mind as he climaxed, his cum spilling over his fist in sticky ropes. He shuddered from the pleasure, but as the fog of orgasm slowly rolled from his brain, his eyes shot open in horror. Had he really just cum thinking about Jay?

Adam shook his head in disbelief. He told himself that the image had just crossed his mind because he had been thinking about inviting him over earlier; it had nothing to do with his orgasm. Feeling slightly better, he got up from his bed and washed off before going downstairs to grab a snack. Later that night, he fell into bed, exhausted from the heat, but unable to sleep because of what had happened earlier. He sighed and reassured himself that he was _not_ gay and that he absolutely had _no_ attraction to his best friend, Jason Reso. Feeling a little less uncomfortable but still not completely convinced, he rolled over and finally drifted off into an uneasy sleep filled with dreams of ridicule and uncertainty.


End file.
